E-mail sent by ME:
My own little game, devised by me.
1. First choose a number between 1 to 507.
2. Write down 10 people of historical significance.
3. Count the number of hairs on your big toe on your right foot and divide by 3.729.
4. Take the first number and multiply it by the number of letters in the Gettysburg Address. Then taking the first three letters from the last names of the second, fourth, and seventh historical figures, use the number equivalent of the letters and add them all together leaving out any names that may somehow be derived from Latin phrases meaning "jumping around with no clear intent" .
5. If the number derived from this is 74, divide be the number of sperm whales beached along the coasts of your favorite continent in the year 1984.
6. If the number should come to be even, subtract half of it and then turn it upside down. If the number should then seem to look like either the holy image of Elvis or Cher after a catastrophic liposuction skip to part 8 and pray for your soul.
7. If the number is odd, just love it for what it is, not what you want it to be dammit. Why, why must you always call me odd?!?! What have I done to you. Just let me live the way I want. Damn you, damn you all, Just let me be me. Just (Sorry for the intrusion but the original writer of this amazing number trick has to go to an emergency therapy session. He will be back after a bit)
a bit
8. Now take the first number and add it to the number derived from your hairy toes.
9. Think of the most perverse thing you can and write it down. Send it to your neighbor's wife signing it with the third historical figures name along with some nasty pictures downloaded from the internet.
10. Taking the number add the number of brain cells found in all the members of the Backstreet Boys ( Hint- The number is less then 2.)
11. Write the amount on a blank check and send it me.
12. Now take the number and using the theory of relativity figure out a way to shoot it through space and time until it appears 2.7 minutes after you sent it.
13. Wait 2.7 minutes.
14. Pick up the number and exclaim "Wow, I just used the theory of relativity to figure out a way to shoot this number through space and time so it appeared 2.7 minutes after I sent it. Cool."
15. Now put the number off to the side and write down your favorite color, the person you would most like to get busy with, and the first 110 pages of the Webster's Encyclopedia.
16. Crumble up the paper and throw it away.
17. Take the number again and subtract it from itself. (Such as if the number is 12 then subtract itself. So 12 - 12).
18. IS THE NUMBER 0?????????
19. Yes, it is. And it always will be? Try it at parties, especially with those stoned completely out of their minds. It is true that certain primitive tribes when shown this will worship you as a God and bestow upon you many beautiful women and partial shares with Microsoft.(Yep, Bill Gates is everywhere. He is evil, True evil. I have seen this I know. Tell the world, tell the worl...............)
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Memo form Bill Gates: Sorry for the intrusion, but the situation had to be rectified. The writer of this number game will come with us now for just a short time. Don't worry. It will all be over soon. Und he vill see za vay vee all do und vorship before my true powver. Take him, maksnell.
--------------------------------
A few days later.
I feel much better now. Really I do. Everythings O.K. Really, Bill Gates is wonderful, a beautiful man filled with beautiful ideas. Gosh, the grass sure is pretty today. Hmm, I wonder what this number is. Gee, I don't know, but who really cares. The game was just too much thinking. I don't need to think anymore. I let Bill do that for me now. Life is so much easier this way. He tells me the coming will be soon. And in the year 2000, he will rise and all shall see his true face. Gee wilikers, isn't life swell.
I just want to sleep.
Sleep.
Sleep.
signed,
Mindclone #34056k56
(formerly Me)
My own little game, devised by me.
1. First choose a number between 1 to 507.
2. Write down 10 people of historical significance.
3. Count the number of hairs on your big toe on your right foot and divide by 3.729.
4. Take the first number and multiply it by the number of letters in the Gettysburg Address. Then taking the first three letters from the last names of the second, fourth, and seventh historical figures, use the number equivalent of the letters and add them all together leaving out any names that may somehow be derived from Latin phrases meaning "jumping around with no clear intent" .
5. If the number derived from this is 74, divide be the number of sperm whales beached along the coasts of your favorite continent in the year 1984.
6. If the number should come to be even, subtract half of it and then turn it upside down. If the number should then seem to look like either the holy image of Elvis or Cher after a catastrophic liposuction skip to part 8 and pray for your soul.
7. If the number is odd, just love it for what it is, not what you want it to be dammit. Why, why must you always call me odd?!?! What have I done to you. Just let me live the way I want. Damn you, damn you all, Just let me be me. Just (Sorry for the intrusion but the original writer of this amazing number trick has to go to an emergency therapy session. He will be back after a bit)
a bit
8. Now take the first number and add it to the number derived from your hairy toes.
9. Think of the most perverse thing you can and write it down. Send it to your neighbor's wife signing it with the third historical figures name along with some nasty pictures downloaded from the internet.
10. Taking the number add the number of brain cells found in all the members of the Backstreet Boys ( Hint- The number is less then 2.)
11. Write the amount on a blank check and send it me.
12. Now take the number and using the theory of relativity figure out a way to shoot it through space and time until it appears 2.7 minutes after you sent it.
13. Wait 2.7 minutes.
14. Pick up the number and exclaim "Wow, I just used the theory of relativity to figure out a way to shoot this number through space and time so it appeared 2.7 minutes after I sent it. Cool."
15. Now put the number off to the side and write down your favorite color, the person you would most like to get busy with, and the first 110 pages of the Webster's Encyclopedia.
16. Crumble up the paper and throw it away.
17. Take the number again and subtract it from itself. (Such as if the number is 12 then subtract itself. So 12 - 12).
18. IS THE NUMBER 0?????????
19. Yes, it is. And it always will be? Try it at parties, especially with those stoned completely out of their minds. It is true that certain primitive tribes when shown this will worship you as a God and bestow upon you many beautiful women and partial shares with Microsoft.(Yep, Bill Gates is everywhere. He is evil, True evil. I have seen this I know. Tell the world, tell the worl...............)
--------------------------------
Memo form Bill Gates: Sorry for the intrusion, but the situation had to be rectified. The writer of this number game will come with us now for just a short time. Don't worry. It will all be over soon. Und he vill see za vay vee all do und vorship before my true powver. Take him, maksnell.
--------------------------------
A few days later.
I feel much better now. Really I do. Everythings O.K. Really, Bill Gates is wonderful, a beautiful man filled with beautiful ideas. Gosh, the grass sure is pretty today. Hmm, I wonder what this number is. Gee, I don't know, but who really cares. The game was just too much thinking. I don't need to think anymore. I let Bill do that for me now. Life is so much easier this way. He tells me the coming will be soon. And in the year 2000, he will rise and all shall see his true face. Gee wilikers, isn't life swell.
I just want to sleep.
Sleep.
Sleep.
signed,
Mindclone #34056k56
(formerly Me)
