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> Tangent #62: Who Are You Wearing?
The following red carpet interviews were taped during the 59th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards which were held at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles, California on Sunday, September 16, 2007.

The scene consists of Joan Rivers (the aging comedienne / annoying E! Red Carpet Interviewer / plastic surgery gone wrong creature) tracking down innocent victims to irritatingly warble, cackle, and caw at as they attempt to walk down the Red Carpet to the get to the event.

JOAN RIVERS: ...and would you look who's coming down the carpet now. OH.. OH... OH MY GAWD I'm gonna have a heart attack because it's the precious Sandra oh..oh.. OH. You know, the oriental one from Grey's Anatomy. She's up for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series for her role as Dr. Cristina Yang. Nothing personal darling, but I'll take a Wang over a Yang any day. Oh... is there a doctor in the house, 'cause I'm dying here. Wait there is... and that's you. Too bad you just play one on t.v., 'cause I really do need someone to check this lump in my breast... OH... OH... too bad at my age they're dangling down around my ankles now... OH... OH...

SANDRAH OH: (oh shit) Ah, hey Joan. Yes. Uh... Nice... nice to see you....

JOAN RIVERS: OH.. OH.. Look at you OH.. You are looking LOVELY tonight. That is a GORGEOUS dress. You simply HAVE to tell me who are you wearing.

SANDRAH OH: This is actually a Jean Paul Gaultier gown. I fell in love with it when I saw it.

JOAN RIVERS: OH... OH... and we fell in love with YOU when we first saw YOU... OH... OH... it's definitely showing off YOUR ANATOMY and YOU sure aren't GRAY, maybe asian yellow, but definitely not GRAY... OH... OH... I'm dying here. Someone call Mel Gibson. I need some mouth to mouth. OH!!!

SANDRAH OH: Yeah... uh... nice talking to you.. gotta go.. (bitch)

JOAN RIVERS: AND... OH MY GOD!!! Who's coming down the carpet now? Why, it's our favorite chainsaw wielding mentally disturbed cannibal Leatherface. OH... OH... you know, from those Texas Chainsaw murders.

LEATHERFACE: Grunt.. grumble...

JOAN RIVERS: You look just WONDERFUL tonight. I simply just HAVE to know who are you wearing.

LEATHERFACE: Grandma. uh... and bits of some other guy in a wheelchair that I chopped up yesterday.

JOAN RIVERS: OH.. uh.. really.. I... what... you... you're kidding... that... oh.. oh.. OH MY GOD!!! (she watches as small pieces fall off his face, then she vomits all over her shoes)