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> AlGoreaphobia
Pronunciation: AL Gorrrr uh foe Bee ahhh
Function: Noun
1: A rather severe pathological anxiety disorder and phobic nervous condition based off of an abnormal and irrational fear of Al Gore.

Many scientists believe that this condition may have occurred because of a previous ATTACK by a pack of wild Al Gores during the patient's early childhood, which may have stunted proper emotional growth and opened the gateway of the mind to this rather curious Mental Disorder.

Signs that a person may have AlGoreaphobia

Upon seeing, hearing, or (on extremely rare instances) merely reading Al Gore's written words, the patient:
  • Twitches uncontrollably.
  • Froths at the mouth.
  • Loses all bowel control.
  • Begins singing Liza Minelli's "Cabaret" in a high falsetto voice.
  • Rips out chunks of hair from his/her back, front, and inner thigh areas.
  • Then is finally lulled into a zombie-like coma by Al's monotonous hypnotic voice (which is rather odd if the patient is only reading something he had written or is just looking at his photo).

Treatments for AlGoreaphobia

Current treatments for a patient suffering from extremes of AlGoreaphobia range from the prescription of Anti-DePresidents medications, alternative treatments via hypnosis, and Graduated Exposure Therapy*.

* Through the Graduated Exposure Therapy based on Pavlovian principles, the patient is slowly and methodically desensitized to Al Gore by being forced to watch "An Inconvenient Truth" and his awkward Oscar speach over and over and over and over and over and over and... until there is simply no more fight left in 'em.

And notice I didn't even bring up Tipper and the PMRC... ooooh... not going there right now... oooooh....